by Fiction Writer Anthony Darden
The truth, in the end, defines us all. No matter who you are or claim to be.
Finding faith and belief when hurt is a hard thing to do. What we want and what we feel is often two different things. We can say it, but do we really do what we say? Because sometimes we are not emotionally equip. Even when someone is still doing us wrong we still, somehow, hold back, not wanting to add fuel to the fire. The what ifs keep popping up. And if your heart is good, it is even harder. We still somehow find kindness and consideration. We still see something valuable and real. We still do not want to believe someone can be so cruel because it is not in our nature. Even if we have no choice but to turn away, a part of us is always there. Even over time when the emotional attachment is long gone, life has branded us. The shores that once lined sunny skies, hand holding, kisses and smiles, linger in the aftermath. The questions are still there. How and when did it all go so wrong? The problem with conflict, if it is not stopped at the root of the problem, it will fester and continue to grow. One bad problem multiples and grows into many other problems. Especially if communication is lost. Mind sets take on a whole new direction. Something so simple has taken on a whole new meaning. And most times, the original problem gets lost in the shuffle. It is equally bad when people run off additional problems that was never there in the first place, problems that were created after the fact of the original problem. Which in any case is accepting defeat. Because if you are willing to punish someone for a problem that arose after the fact, you are indeed adding fuel to the fire. When this is the case, there, most often, is no turning back because, most times, logic and reason has been thrown out the window. How we defend our self depends on our nature. We can take the high road, or the low road. Though, regardless, whatever road taken, someone has to go up, and someone has to go down. A good natured person will only take what is needed to survive. They will display empathy and kindness. They will, at all cost, try to avoid the drama and bow out gracefully. Because good people know their value and worth. They know what they have contributed, and what they have to contribute to satisfy their life and move forward. Only people that have nothing to contribute will take the low road. If they have given nothing in the relationship, they will try and take everything, even your good name and rep. They need to feed and, most often, will not care if they hurt you or not. And even then, the good nature of a sentimental person will not heed the warning because they are not capable. Which, most often, is their downfall.
Signs of warning should go out to all friends and relatives. If your partner has all along been putting you down behind your back, and building a fanbase to look better and present them self in a better light, logic, reason, and the truth, will eventually come to light. A partner that talks about another partner, is not holding you down, and in the end, will throw you under the bus. People that really care for each other have each other’s back at all time. You cannot say you love someone, and in the same breath, put them down behind their back. And when it comes to family and friends, relationships are built on mutual respect, and not the voice of deception that invade and deteriorates the value of real, honest relationships. Those that would choose to judge you on the validation of someone else’s word, and not your valued relationship with them, are not worthy. True friends and family do not takes sides, especially if your relations is built on mutual respect. Because even if the relationship between you and your partner ends, family and real friends still remain, unless you have done something very bad, beyond the normal acts of breaking up, it is understandable. But if you have just grown apart, and you find that you need the time apart, people should make their own judgment and only use support to find faith, belief, encouragement, and an understanding. And not as a sounding board to bash and put their ex down. To harbor dismay can only bring contempt and lack of productivity. It is emotional self destruction.
Although we find our self with heartache, we are still human. Just as our ex. Some ex’s go on to be better friends than lovers. And you must not forget, the kindness you offer goes a long way in repairing your heart, and also your ex’s heart. Always take the high road even when sometimes the high road seems null. It makes you a better human being that cares not only about yourself, but also the safety and welfare of others. It also moves you forward in acceptance. It relinquish the baggage that can often build up into resentment and even hate. And although it may seem, sometime, extremely hard, keep your head up, move forward, and know the validity of your character. Because no matter who you are, or claim to be, the truth, in the end, define us all.